Wanting What Others Have

I was the first of my friends to get married, and the first to have kids. Now when I was "planning" my life, I thought that I would go through school have a good career, find a good man to marry, work for 3-5 years and THEN think about having kids. But that wasn't in store for me. I finished some school, married the Hubs, graduated with my Cert. in Dental Technology, and had a pretty good job to help me get through school. My SURPRISE, aka Kid #1 came even after we were being EXTRA careful to NOT have kids. So chalk it up to "It was meant to be..". Because we had some extra complication with kid #1 (bi-lateral club foot) it was best that I stayed at home with him so I could be there for EVERY surgery. My kid needed a MOM not a baby sitter, since we had a lot of family support, staying at home was something we thought we could do and it would be best if I put my schooling on hold until we were in the clear. I've done as much school as I could do when I could. Now a mom of 2 I am NOT even close to finishing school. Most of my friends are done with school and starting to buy houses and start families. I know things aren't always going to go as planned but I really want to be done with school. I was looking at my credits and I am only half way there. Ben is going to be in school for the next 3 years (at least) and so odds are I will have to once again put my goal of finishing my education on hold. I don't think that there is anything wrong with being "just a mom", because being a mom takes a LOT more then one might think. I know that I feel better about myself and more accomplished by having more education under my belt. This next semester I will be taking night classes and I will be gone 3 nights a week. It seems so hard to peel myself away from my kids, especially since I have my baby who is so new. I don't want to miss out on the important things that will be happening to them but I also want to be able to be some-what of the woman that I had planned on being.